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Beginning Weight, 215
Beginning Weight, 254
These are all books & magazines I have read (or am reading) that I would recommend. As a whole, they provide excellent tips on nutrition & physical and emotional wellness.
Heath & Fitness Articles
Give me a beat - I'll wiggle.
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February 12 It's OK Jenny! It's OK Jenny! I see that you had a ruff week last week and I just want to let you know it's OK. We all stumble some times, we all have our bad days, but it's OK. I'm here to support you. I'm here for you when you faulter. I know you can do this. I know you can loose the weight. I believe in you and I always have; I mean - you're my big sister, in my eyes you've always been able to do anything. I know that if you refocus and put in your all, you'll make it! Know that I love you and I believe in you! February 10 What do you buy to satify your clothes craving?I do believe that there is such a thing known as "clothes craving". And there are too many times that I buy another item as a replacement to fulfill that need - frankly, I am tired of it.
Too often I'll see a stylish top or pants and, instead of buying it for myself, I'll buy it for someone else. Or I'll purposely go clothes shopping for someone else. Or I'll buy shoes, jewelry, a purse - I have a closet full with no outfits to wear with them. Or I'll purchase something for the home such as a picture, a vase, flowers, a decorative pillow, new rugs - I have quite a stylish and comfortable home.
But when it comes to ME, I am wearing some of the same outfits from years ago - not because I look adorable in them but simply because they fit. I wear the same set of clothes Monday through Friday. When it comes to ME, I now want more. I want to be able to walk into the "regular" clothing store and be able to buy something off the rack. I want to wear something because it is trendy. I want to wear clothes that will compliment the costume jewelry and designer bags that I already own.
I am making myself a priority. And then I will be noticed simply because I am me.
February 08 Couldn't Do ItI've had a extremely "fluctuating" & frustrating week and, to be honest, I purposely didn't choose the avenues to really stay on course... I didn't care, so what happened?
I gained two pounds this week and, as I mentioned in an earlier blog, I have been disconnected which has lead to such a disappointment for me. I am having a hard time figuring out what has triggered my lack of commitment - I really haven't cared about diet or exercise in the least. At first, I justified it as a well needed break but then I thought, "A break from what?! This is supposed to be a lifestyle change and if my actions over the last few weeks were reflective of my new lifestyle then why would I need a break?"
I remind myself often that I didn't become unhealthy overnight; therefore, becoming well shouldn't take only a mere month or two. I choose to do this, I chose this challenge for myself. Right now, I'm finding no satisfaction in any of the previous reasoning that I have given myself over the weeks. It is difficult though because I want so much more but I'm realizing that I AM the one creating these diversions that delay my arrival of getting there thus the internal struggle - so, I find myself asking the same question once again, "How do I get past this?"
It was once said to me that if we are out of our comfort zones, then it is a direct indication that you are changing... growing. I'm uncomfortable and that is a good thing but "Will I ever have time to simply BE?" February 05 Age is just a numberIn times of our biggest needs, we don't have to dig deep to find our inspiration.
I have been struggling these few days and felt a need to disconnect - how easy it was to dive right back into my previous chaos. Before I let myself spiral completely out of control, I began to dig into my thoughts for something to bring me back to center. And then, a smile came to me with a not so distant occurrence.
I decided that when I reach a breaking point and I need one last push to continue on my path or to exhaust my last ounce of energy, I would think about an encounter I had not long ago. I recall my participation in a 1/2 marathon when an elderly lady had passed me. I was close to my destination's end; it was at that moment that I was stretched mentally and physically, at the brink of looking for a reason to give up, and then my "inspiration" passed me with an encouraging smile bearing a sign saying, "It is my eighth birthday today and this is my first marathon." Wow! is all I could think and there is where I will find my needed strength to continue on.
Find your inspiration and press on. February 02 High Five Juls!!
I wanted to send a high five (even though it looks more like a low five) to my little sis, Juls, back in Chicago. I am so proud of you for losing 10 pounds this month - I know that we've faced some challenges but we've prevailed. Thanks for the support, you are an awesome inspiration. I miss you tons, your big sis. February 01 An afterthought of my Sister's Last BlogNot to sound negative, but I disagree with my wonderful sister. I do understand that people have the same feelings that she does along the lines of not feeling comfy with taking pictures, and why is fat not "attractive". I have a different mind set though. I'm working out for me. I want to get healthly, I want to do this for myself. I want to be there to support my sister. I don't really care what other people think. If I walk down the street and a passerby thinks, "Look at that fat slob" then there is something wrong with them--- NOT me. I am who I am and I love it. If the health factor wasn't involved, I'd be thrill with staying just the way I am. I AM BEAUTIFUL. MY SISTER IS BEAUTIFUL. ALL OF YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! There is no reason to pay attention to standards in society. Once you look past the superficial, that is where you find the true beauty. There are many people who fit into society's standard of "true beauty" who are complete assholes and dicks. How is that attractive or appealing? I'd rather be overweight and pleasant to be around which in turn makes me a more beautiful person. Look at my pictures; I am happy! I'm big and I'm proud of myself. I love me! And at some point, I'll be healthly and I'll be proud of myself because of that, but not just because of that - weight isn't everything. There isn't a single one of your pages that I have looked at that I haven't thought to myself this person is a wonderful, beautiful person. I encourage everyone to keep up the good work, but just remember. . . YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL NO MATTER WHAT. No amount of weight can change that. January 31 PhotosI been spending much time looking and absorbing other BL web pages this evening, and what I have found is great inspiration.
The stories of struggle come with inspiration; despite the noted affirmations and visited struggles, the one thing I have noticed is the absence of photos conveying those "happy" feelings - I can painfully relate. What I see is people uncomfortable in the spotlight, tugging on their clothing to cover just a bit more, people hiding behind others to disguise their full figure, photos of only bodies (torsos) minus the identifying facial expressions denying the connection to being fat, more old photos than new with the yearning to be what once was - and then I recognize myself, it is reflected back in every awkward photo.
Why is fat so ugly? Why is the person we are in the inside not validated and easily dismissed because of the extra weight?
To get myself beyond these feelings of void and negativity, I read everyone's whispers of hope; there is where I find my inspiration, and with every recognition of success, there is where I find my hope. Everyone's reason for losing weight is so valid and familiar - I truly wish everyone the best outcome because "We all deserve it". January 29 AggravationI watched my friend bite into a big, cheesy burger. Then, without taking a breath, she stuck 4 or 5 fries into her mouth. I glared at her slender 5'8" frame, which is not more then a hundred twenty pounds soaking wet, just wondering... "How?" "So, I've been playing basketball at the college for the past week. You know, just 10 or 15 minute games a couple of times," she said. I struggled to understand her through the sloppy mess she was chewing. She continued, " . . . and get this, I lost 6 pounds out of nowhere! Pretty cool, don't you think?" My jaw dropped and I could feel the veins almost popping out of my skin. "Ummm... excuse me? What do you mean 6 pounds?" "Yeah, 6 pounds. All I did differently last week was like play 5 games of basketball." A bit of grease dripped down off of her grin. " You mean to tell me I've been stressing out over working my ass off and losing no weight, and you didn't even try but lost 6 pounds?!?!" I clenched my fist tightly. " Yep." She gave me that same dumb grin. She wasn't trying to be mean, and I just had to think that she wasn't intentionally putting me down. Some people have better metabolisms then others. Deep Breath! She was only stating a fact, which sucks, but she just thought it was an interesting tidbit of information. Deep Breath! I managed to calm my aggravation, and I reminded myself that she is my friend. Deep Breath! I was calm. . . until she spoke again. "I thought it was cool that I lost that random weight, but my girlfriend got mad cause she thinks I need to gain like 20 pounds. . ." I just thought to myself. . . "Ummm, Excuse me!?!" as I felt that aggravation hit me again. January 28 Biggest Loser Challenge of the Week: Step four
This Million Pound Match-Up is one the greatest support systems we've each created by participating on a daily/weekly basis. We have a need and find solace in communicating with those around us.
This week's challenge is to reach out to one or two individuals in the BL community that you have not communicated with previously - give them a shout out, a boost of encouragement, or join in on their triumphs. We all need someone to lean on, so why not each other.
Have a great week and KEEP GOING!
Biggest Loser Challenge of the Week January 27 SupportThe consistant answer has been, "Support."
I, like many others, attended the Biggest Loser Tour event. I spoke with Bette Sue, Bill, Hollie, the on site trainers and nutritionists, and asked my most pressing question, "As the weeks press on, how do you stay motivated to continue?" The answer in one form or another reflected upon maintaining a support system.
Everyone of the BL crew expressed to me how important it was to find support from those who are going through similar struggles of your own - it's where the connection that motivates you comes from; if you find ones who are alike, they will also be the ones who lift you up when you are down. I believe this idea of having a commonality bond because I notice how often I turn to blogging - writing my own and reading the words of others. This Million Pound Match-Up has definitely created a community where I find solace, and a place where I celebrate those small triumphs. I am learning something everyday from those around me and reaching out to those in need.
And I appreciate every moment.
January 26 EncouragementThis support system is unfaltering and, "Why?" Because we can all relate - relate to any of those feelings that deal with being uncomfortable in our own skin, the moments we've let an opportunity pass because of weight, the noticeable exhaustion of breath from climbing the stairs, the guilt we feel from eating anything but a salad at a restuarant, the yearning to be noticed with confidence, or the wanting of comfort that coincides with knowing you are healthy. We all want something more than what we have... and it is all good.
I've been reading quite a few blogs today and there seems to be a common theme among so many - FRUSTRATION. The third- fourth week is proving to be the most challenging yet; the newness has warn off and the moment of truth is upon us. Will we continue? Or will we submit to the temptations of our all too familiar, old habits? I have thought hard about that today and wonder, "Why now?" I have made small changes these last few weeks and I am feeling BETTER so why would I doubt what is to come - with that comes encouragement.
I want to share one of the most encouraging things that was recently said to me by one of our fellow bloggers: she told me, "Make yourself a priority. You are worth it" Powerful and point taken. If we don't make ourselves a priority then who will? Thank you Michelle.
Think about it and press on.
January 24 Time!Where has all my time gone to?!?!?! I miss it. It seems like a diet takes up the better part of your day. You wake up (earlier then before), make breakfast, take a shower, pack a healthy lunch for work (no more quick fast food), drive an hour to work, work, drive an hour home, work out, make dinner (instead of ordering in), and after all of that I'm only left with an hour or two to hang out with my husband and dog. WHERE DID MY DAY GO?
I am staying determined with my diet but I had so much more time before without a diet then now with one. Am I not good at managing my time or are their other people feeling like this? Any suggests on how to condense things? I wish I had a personal driver because then I could figure out a way to workout on the way to and from work. I know it's not easy to do anything in the back of a car, but if it meant it would add two hours to my day----I would figure out a way! :) I'll be the first person to invent back seat aerobics.  January 23 How do you manage?Is working out at 4AM really feasible?
I have heard so often that scheduling your workout first thing in the morning is the most beneficial because your metabolism is up and you would then be burning calories throughout the day. But, how can I get up so early without being tired throughout the day? Does it get easier as your dedication prevails?
I am finding it hard to manage and schedule the ideal routine time to workout. I check-in at school around 6:30 AM to get my classroom ready before the first bell chime at just after 7AM; then, the flood of students all wide-eyed show up eager to learn the days lesson (or at least that is what I hope for, the eagerness).  A 4AM workout is devastating to my efforts of being alert. I am trying desperately to become a "morning person" and flip my schedule around to allow for an AM workout but... 4AM. Ouch! January 22 Hit it on the nose!We must be mind readers! Did you notice that Bob's tip of the week was to eat breakfast? That was our posted challenge last week... looks like we are starting to figure this lifetstyle thing out. Best of wishes to everyone - almost bedtime. January 21 MomHey, I love our mom too.
Yeah for mom! It is so important to our mom to provide us with support - on one of the first days of creating our space, she figured out how to set up an account just so she could leave us a supportive message in our guest book. We're blessed.
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Jennifer and Julie's SpaceMillion Pound Match-Up
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Invite as friend
